Lately I’ve found myself a little out of focus. I flit around from one idea to the next, never falling completely in love with any of them. One moment I want to sew, and then I sit down at the machine and find myself annoyed with my bobbin thread and lose interest really quickly.
Then I’ll pull up good old ‘Word’ on my laptop but start daydreaming of the books I got for my birthday. I’ll read a couple paragraphs and realize I’m hungry or thirsty and put the book down having not really allowed myself to ingest the words.
This isn’t like me.
I’m a know what I want and grab for it kinda girl. And it’s not even the knowing what I want part that’s the problem…it’s the grabbing.
I want to write.
I want to sew.
I want to read.
So why aren’t I?
Hmmm. I don’t want to make a bunch of excuses for my pathetic failures to produce, enjoy or partake but I will spend some time pondering this lack of ambition. Yesterday I wrote about Creativity Killers and going over that list there are one or two that stand out for me, mainly fatigue and chaos. There’s been chaos at work and it’s making me damn tired. Little H has been overly cranky and not sleeping well. That’s making me tired too. Still, I’ve gotten past those things before and I’m sure I will this time. Maybe my creative stars are out of alignment and I’ll just have to wait it out. In the meantime, I’ll try to surround myself with inspiring things, sights and sounds.
How are you fairing these days? Are you meeting your goals?
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I’ve been OK writing in the days recently, but when night comes I’ve just been too exhausted and low on energy to do anything. I think it’s the wear and tear of the day.
i have noticed that my posts have been a little lack luster lately. and i know that my readers can see it b/c i’m not getting the comments or traffic that i usually get. i think it’s partly b/c i have had a lot going on the last few weeks and it’s been really hard to focus on my writing. hang in there! it’ll pass…
I most defiantly have this happen at times.
Sometimes I think it’s due to a lot going on in my life and my mind being so busy with figuring things out. Life will do that
I haven’t had as much time to focus on creative endeavors since my son was born – he’s six months old – so sometimes when I do have time, it’s hard to decide what to do. I’m getting used to being a mom though and gradually figuring out how to fit in my creative work.
I totally understand what you mean, I’ve been there. I am realizing that I don’t have the luxury of doing everything anymore. I like to write, sew, dance (took lots of modern dance classes in my younger days), research, etc. Once I decided that I was going to concentrate on sewing and perfect my skills, I have felt a sense of peace and know that I will get to the other things later on in life.